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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Dear ___________ (insert idiot's name here) letters

Dear Lady in the White Truck,

Please note that my parking space is only 4 spaces away from the second Kroger parking lot, which has a million empty spaces in which you could park.  Please also note that I am packing many groceries and a sleeping baby in a carseat, so I'm not going to move any faster.  You are a complete idiot to be blocking traffic for my spot, which ain't great to begin with.

Have a Merry Fucking Christmas, Dumbass.

Carrie


Dear Man in Kroger,

Why the hell are you here if you are just going to stand there in the middle of the aisle, looking lost?  Please go find your wife, ask for the car keys and go sit your ass down where you will not be in my way.

P.S. Watch out for the lady in the white truck blocking traffic.

Carrie


Dear Lady in Kroger with the Mile Long Shopping List,

I have a baby with me therefore I want to get my stuff and get the hell outta dodge.  Please move yourself and your cart out of my way.  If you want to ogle the bean section all evening, be my guest, but I got better things to do with my time.

Carrie



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