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Sunday, January 17, 2010

Breastfeeding odds and ends and opinions

I have spent nearly 30 months of my life nursing a baby, and I still have (hopefully) many months to go before I end my reign as a breastfeeding momma.  And over the years, my perspectives on breastfeeding have changed.

When I first had N, I wanted to nurse her for 2 years.  Of course, I had never had a child so I really didn't know what a 2-year-old was like.  When she was 7 months old, I developed a ductal yeast infection and mastitis in my right breast, and the poor ole girl on the right side of my chest was never the same.  I had a rash on my nipple that didn't go away until months after I'd weaned N.  So breastfeeding from months 7-12 was a right royal PITA.  But I did it because 1. N wouldn't take a bottle, and 2. I am extremely cheap, and 3. I think breast is best.

I was a lot more militant about nursing than I am now.  Very judgmental of women who didn't nurse at all or who only nursed for a short period of time.  Time and age and having multiple children and medication have mellowed me out.

With G, I set 6 months as my goal because I just didn't know how things would go down.  The first 2-3 months of that time hurt due to my sensitive skin.  But eventually we got into a groove, my girls toughened up, and I nursed him for 14 months.

And now I am at entering the 4th month of nursing M.  He has finally learned how to nurse well, and, again, my girls have regrown new, tougher skin.  I haven't set a goal with M.  Whatever, ya know.  I'll wean eventually, and hopefully later rather than sooner.

I'd be lying if I said I still don't retain some judgment about women who chose not to breastfeed.  But I also make a judgment about women who get their baby girls' ears pierced when they are infants.  And women who circumcise their sons just to make their boys matchy/matchy with daddy, without actually researching the procedure.  And women who make their sons Juniors.  But my opinion is only really valuable to me.

Still I do think it is sad that more babies aren't nursed longer.
But I can understand why they are not.
Had I chosen to continue teaching or if I'd had to continue teaching, there would have been no way I could have nursed past maternity leave.  An office job is more conducive to pumping.  I don't see that it would be feasible to even attempt pumping as a teacher.

And most women aren't as eager to be in pain as long as I have been in my nursing adventures.  I have always enjoyed a challenge, and I have had my share of breastfeeding challenges.  The truth is I am either an extremely persevering individual or downright stupid.  For me, though, I was willing to put up with pain and ointments and such because of allergies on both sides (mine and hubby's) and my simple feeling that there is nothing better than mommy's milk for a baby.

Mind you, at first and to some extent now, I thought breastfeeding would cure all ills.  I thought my kids wouldn't get sick, like, ever.  They wouldn't have allergies or ear infections.  But breastfeeding can't negate a family history of sinus, ear and allergy problems.  But I like to believe that nursing my babies, even if they do have ear problems, don't have as severe of problems as they might have had I not nursed them as long as I did.  But who knows???

As my children get older, I realize that nursing, though important to me, is only one small piece of the things I do as a mom to help my children become independent, caring, responsible, decent human beings.  N knows she was breastfed and hopefully, if and when she becomes a mom she will opt to breastfeed her children for an extended period of time.  And my sons will know they were breastfed and will hopefully support their wives if they chose to breastfeed.

Despite my struggles with nursing, it is a cinch compared to the relationship and behavior challenges every momma faces when raising someone from infancy to adulthood.

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