I have long suffered from health-related anxiety. It used to only be my health over which I fretted, but since becoming a mom, I allot most of my worrying budget to the kids and their health. I was thinking today that I wish I had anxiety related to white-water rafting or dark alleys or being bitten by wolverines, something that would be fairly easy to avoid.
But kids and sickness share the same bed, so I find myself getting worked up more often than I'd like. And having 3 kids? Well, the sickness anxiety just doesn't EVER seem to go away. As soon as one starts feeling better, another one is needing the ibuprofen.
In January, I was worrying about G's health. He had been so sickly in the fall, winding up with RSV at Christmas and a sinus infection soon after.
But lately I have been worrying about N. She has been having increasingly frequent bouts of strep throat, and today she was home sick again with what seems like strep symptoms. The concern I have is that she just took her last dose of Omnicef for strep throat YESTERDAY morning. By late morning she was saying she was cold, which usually means a high fever is right around the corner. And in the wee hours of this morning, her temperature was a solid 101.
She doesn't have a stuffy nose, loose bowels, a cough. Nothing that would be an obvious indication of a viral infection.
So I'm stewing over whether this is strep that never went away with the Omnicef, which seems unlikely but I'll worry about it anyway. And then I'm worrying whether she'll need to have her tonsils removed (I went ahead and scheduled the ENT to look at her on June 6 when I take G in for his every-6-month-ear-tube-check-up). But I'm also worrying that if she doesn't get her tonsils removed, we will keep on this antibiotic train, which actually scares me far worse than the idea of a tonsillectomy.
I get really freaked out by the prospect of antibiotic-resistance, so I am not one of those parents who badger the doctor for antibiotics needlessly.
And then when I am firmly cemented in panic, I do a little number I like to call, "Anxiety Over Living in a Time Before Antibiotics/Safe Surgery Even Though We Do Not Live in Such a Time." This is when I think things like, "If we didn't have antibiotics, N could die from strep throat." And "If we didn't have safe surgery, N could die from getting her tonsils removed."
Basically, N could die.
Unfortunately, once I am doing this routine I harken back to other illnesses and/or surgeries, such as my c-section with G. And I start thinking that I could have died while trying to deliver a breech baby. Or he could have died. Or I could have died from my infected c-section incision after having M in October if antibiotics weren't around.
And, finally, I end up on this street: If antidepressants weren't invented yet, I would be locked in an insane asylum for my OCD and generalized anxiety.
Having a sick child at home is never fun for any parent, but when you've got the added fun of health-anxiety it damn near lays you out.
3 comments:
Josh had his tonsils out last year (about one week before the end of his kindergarten year). He had strep throat 5 times between January and May of that year. His ENT said he was never really getting rid of it because the infection was staying in his tonsils. Anyway, he did well. He was in a lot of pain for about a week and a half and milked it for another 2-3 weeks. He hasn't had strep since.
It is very obvious that we tend to become anxious whenever the concern comes related to our health! However I would advise not to take everything so seriously that you miss multiple direction to grab the solution. Thanks for the post!
Anxiety can occur in extreme cases but I would suggest to keep yourself calm! There is always a positive end and proper medication and care can make the things turn up!
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