Doldrums

N has diarrhea. Riveting news, I know, but it has sent me into the doldrums because she will have to stay home from school tomorrow. She doesn't have a fever and isn't acting sick...she has just had a couple episodes of the runs today, and I don't want that happening at school. I don't want it happening at home either, but I'm her mom so this is what I signed up for (this particularly un-fun part of mothering was noted in the small print, apparently).

So having her home tomorrow totally messes up my weekday schedule, and my panties get into such a twist when my routine is messed with. Hence the reason I hate, hate, hate the weekends.

Since having children, the weekends have become the bane of my existence. Because, and I know I have blogged about this before, I never get a weekend. I don't get to sleep in. I don't get to "not work my regular job." I still have to clean up messes, deal with children, run errands, etc, etc. And it just plain sucks ass.

Being extremely pregnant certainly doesn't help either.

Maybe this is part of the reason I have, since becoming a mom, extended my

birthday celebration of Sep 13th into my birthmonth celebration. Next weekend, I am going for a haircut and color, and maybe a pedicure as the cherry on top of the day. I am scheduling my pregnancy massage for nearer my birthday. I will celebrate with my parents and with my kids/hubby with some sort of meal/dessert thingy around mid-month. I'm going to take advantage of turning 36 by doing some of the things I want to do.....because I rarely get to do them.

I spend so much of my time looking after everyone else's needs that I ignore my own. Lord knows I know I have them....they just get pushed back, pushed back, ignored, denied.

With feeling so darn tired and out of sorts, I have been having a wee little pity party for myself, but I read N some stories about families living during the pioneer days, and I know I am such a complete wuss. Pioneer women baked meals from scratch every day and had to hoe the garden even when they were very pregnant, and their husbands forced them to travel in a wagon cross-country to have a bigger yard. They didn't have automatic washers and dryers and Kroger stores nearby. Or Lexapro to get them through the doldrums.

But this too shall pass. N will be over her GI issues and back at school, and my week will fall back into place, and eventually I will not feel and look like a beached whale.