I have only partial brain power these days, so my thoughts here will be all over the place.
First, I love both my children, but the same things happen with one's feelings toward an older child when a 2nd child is born that happens to one's feelings about one's pets when a 1st child is born. Before you have a 1st child, you think you can't love anyone as much as you love your pets. Then your 1st child arrives and not only do the pets move down the totem pole of importance, but you actually start to really dislike them because they are a hassle when they meow for food 11 million times a day or yak a hairball in the middle of the kitchen table. Well, 2nd baby comes along and you sorta feel similar things about your older child. (Or maybe it is just me).
Second, bonding for me is different with G. With N, I was over-the-top in love instantly (and probably the start of a not-too-healthy obsessive love on my part). Perhaps because of N, I am not seeing parenthood with rosy glasses and so my bonding with G is slower (plus I just don't like the wormy stage of infancy).
Third---I now have a closet full of skinny clothes that no longer fit me. I had to go to Wal-Mart and Target today to buy some new pants, belt and underwear. I am only 7.5 lbs over my pre-pregnancy weight but I think things have shifted. I actually look like I have some hips now.
Yesterday I managed to take N and G to Hallmark, Blockbuster and Wal-Mart. While exhausted, no one cried, ran off or lost their minds. Hooray! I think I can do this.
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