A stiff pr*ck has no conscience--and neither do many businesses

This is gonna be a long one.  Get some popcorn, a drink and settle in friends.

In 2003, a few months before N was born, D and I purchased a Simmons Mocha Cambridge crib that converts into a daybed and full-size bed.  In 2007, when I was pregnant with G, D and I thought we'd better go ahead and purchase whatever accessories we needed in order to one day make the crib full-sized. We were fearful that at some point whatever we needed would be discontinued and we would be stuck.  And so I called Babies R Us in May 2007 and told them I needed to order whatever parts would turn the crib into a full-size bed.  I gave them the model number and style of the crib via phone.  We picked up the parts, paid $93.99 and promptly stuck the box in N's closet for that day in the future when we would need them.   

That future day was Sunday.  

You see, since we moved N and G into a shared room in February of this year, D and I have been reading to them at night in N's twin bed (which was my bed when I was a kid).  While perfect for one 6-year-old, it is a virtual can of sardines with a 6-year-old, toddler and parent trying to turn pages.  And so we decided to purchase a full-size mattress for N and convert G's crib (which was N's crib) into a bed.  On Saturday afternoon, I ordered a mattress which was to be delivered yesterday.  

On Sunday night, D got out the box and discovered that the person at Babies R Us had ordered us the WRONG PARTS.  

Just effin great.  

It's been 3 years since we purchased it, and we have no receipt.  

So I called Babies R Us, explained the situation, and asked what we needed that their dumbass associated didn't sell us to turn the crib into a full-size bed.  

Associate C said no returns after 90 days, which is standard.  After 3 years, and with no receipt, I knew we were plum out of luck.  She told me to call Simmons to find out for sure what rails we needed.

Amazingly, I was able to locate the receipt in a binder late in the night on Sunday.

Even with the receipt, though, I figured it was a long-shot to get the wrong rails returned.  Ya know, cause it's been 3 years and all.  Even though Babies R Us was in the wrong.  Completely.  

And so Monday morning, I called Simmons, explained the situation to the representative, and asked if I could order the correct rails from them.  Because of the 90 day return limit, which Associate C at Babies R Us had mentioned, and my concern that Babies R Us would order the wrong thing again, I went ahead and ordered the rails I need from Simmons.  By credit card.  Monday morning, around 8:30.  

I asked Representative L if there were other Simmons beds that would work with the wrong rails I have.  I figure I've got 3 kids, I need 3 beds, and I'd already spent $93.99 on rails in 2007.  She told me 2 styles.  One was on costco.com, but you had to purchase 2 other pieces of furniture with the crib.  Fail.  And the other style is sold somewhere across the country at a store I've never heard of.    

So I called Babies R Us and spoke to Manager M to see if they carried either of these cribs.  My local Babies R Us no longer carries Simmons beds.  After much complaining by me, Manager M says that if I order the correct bed rails from them, they will take back the wrong rails and that they want to "make it right." (Which as far as I'm concerned means you take back the wrong rails without question since ya'll fucked up and give me a goddam in-store credit for the entire $93.99 NO QUESTIONS ASKED).  

But, again, I am leery of ordering from them, since they screwed up initially.  Manager M emails someone who emails someone to ensure that the accessories they can order are, indeed, the right ones.  

Today I found out that the bed rails they can order are the right ones (or so they say), and so I call Simmons to cancel my order.  I somehow managed to get Representative L on the phone again.  Yesterday, some 30 hours previously, she had told me it would take 2-3 weeks to get the rails.  When I have her on the phone today, she says my credit card has already been charged, the rails are at the warehouse and I cannot cancel my order.  

To which I say, "BULLSHIT!!"

I then explain to her that she never said this was a final sale, no returns, cannot cancel orders when I spoke with her yesterday.  (I mean, even Shutterfly gives you a window of opportunity to cancel photo books that you flippin create yourself.)  And if she won't cancel the order and credit my card now, I will dispute the charge with my credit card company.  And that I'd like to speak to her supervisor.  

So I am transferred to Supervisor T, who tells me the order is at the warehouse, and it cannot be canceled.  Or if she does cancel the order there is a $50 charge because Simmons pays a fee to swipe credit cards.  And then she asks, "Well did you contact Babies R Us before you called and ordered the rails from us?," and "Did Babies R Us offer to credit you for the rails?"

And at this point, my head exploded, followed closely by my tongue.  Because I have fucking HAD IT with these 2 companies fucking with me.  I proceeded to tell Supervisor T the entire story from the get-go.  That Babies R Us had been giving me the run-around and now Simmons was screwing with me too.  

During my monologue, Supervisor T would come in and out, like she was on her cell phone in a tunnel underwater.  Which made me think she wasn't hearing a word I was saying.  Which pissed me off even more.  I finally said, "ARE YOU THERE?  ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME BECAUSE YOU KEEP GOING IN AND OUT?"  

It was at this point, Supervisor T said she would credit my card and cancel the order.  And so I wrote down everything and said it back to her like she was from Mars and had very little understanding of English---"Today's date is June 22nd and you will credit my card for $80 for the canceled order."  She then said, "I'll credit it today but I don't know when it will post."  To which I said, "I will check my credit card balance online, and if it hasn't credited in a month, I will be calling back to speak directly with you, do you understand?"  

Anyone need some vodka now because I sure did after all this crap.

So here is the thing.  Despite what Rand Paul and other libertarians think. businesses need to be held accountable because they are not ethical entities.  People can be ethical.  Businesses cannot.  They have no conscience.  

And it makes me think I am kinda stupid for attempting to be "prepared" by purchasing items well in advance of when I will need them.  

That's what I get for trying to think ahead.