Friday, January 6, 2012

Does this mean I'm gonna die soon?

Today has been a day of all sorts of good news.  

This morning I learned that next Friday G will be having his last speech therapy session followed by his exit evaluation/meeting.  In less than a year, he has gone from a slobbery mush-mouth to an age-appropriate pretty articulate little kid.  

In N's folder was a note from her art teacher stating that N's artwork is being entered into a local (and pretty prominent) museum's art contest.  She was one of 5 students selected from all the second graders at her school.  

Wow!  Superb news!  Exciting!

To prove that OCD and generalized anxiety cannot be eliminated, only relieved, by antidepressants, I did have the thought, "Surely all this good news means I am gonna die soon because things cannot possibly be going so well without something horrible happening."  Old catastrophic thinking habits die hard.  I was able to swish it away with my great Jedi-Lexapro force, but the fact that it still reared its head is always a little disappointing.  I may feel cured, but I ain't and never will be.  

Of course the something horrible could just be the weather, which is freakishly warm for January and surely a sign of humanity's doom.  Most people enjoy the days of 65 degree temps in winter, but they set me into short panic spasms.  

Dammit, it's January.  We need some snow if for no other reason than to lull me into a false sense of security that global warming may not really be real (despite endless scientific studies showing it is).   

Somebody seems to be winning today's irrationality fight, and it's not the medicated side of my brain.  

1 comment:

Keri said...

I have to say, for all of my weird thoughts and fears, I've never experienced the good news = imminent tragedy phenomenon. That must suck, putting something of a damper on the joy.