Because I think N and I are both in need of a new routine.
A number of things have contributed to our shared funk, I think.
First, the pool doesn't open now until 3:30 pm, so it is pointless to even try to go since G is a late napper, and I have to fix dinner sometime.
Second, we don't have a tv in the living room anymore since the built-ins are still a work in progress. No doors, only primer. Thus, no entertainment on the main floor.
Third, I think I am tired of having her around all the time. (I thought I would never say this.)
Fourth, I think she is tired of being around me all the time.
Fifth, G makes it impossible to do lots of fun stuff we like to do, like shop or run errands. He is Mr. I Don't Wanna Be in a Shopping Cart, and If You Let Me Down I Will Destroy the Store.
So I have been biting my tongue lately because she has just been getting on my nerves.
I expect there will come a time when I will miss hearing her say, "Mom, watch this!" But most of the time when she says it and I watch her, I have no inkling what it is she is trying to impress me with. She' ll be doing something really subtle, like crossing her feet at the ankles, when I am expecting her hair to be set afire. Or she'll say, "Mom, watch," which could mean watch her, watch the tv, watch G do something, watch the cats. My strained patience can be heard in my voice as I ask, "Watch WHAAAAAT????"
And then there is her plaintive, "Mom, play with me." I am nearly 35 years old, so playing Alice in Wonderland or Ballet Class or Baby Daycare has very, very little appeal (especially when we are playing it for the 4,000,000th time). But I play with her anyway. Often, she seems to find me so boring that she ends up just wandering around, and I'm left wondering if we are still playing or if her putzing around is part of her game plan.
And then there is her attempt to have me do things with her that she sees me doing with G, which I find so annoying. She wants me to bounce her on my lap and sing "Giddye Up Horsey." Or she wants me to grab her legs and pull her across the bed, as I do with G to keep him from crawling off the bed. I feel like I am constantly saying, "N, you are too big to do this anymore" and "N, you're a big girl and mommy can't do that with you." I know she sees me playing with him and feels jealous and wants to be a part of something special with me, but she forgets the hour I play Alice or daycare or push her on the swingset when G naps. G rarely gets any time with just mommy without N horning in.
So I am ready for a change of pace. A new routine. A chance for us to be away from each other for a bit. We need some breathing room.
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