Today D stayed home from work with the intent to get some fix-it things done around the house. I was gonna take N and G to the pool. N wanted D to go with us, so honey-dos were put on hold for awhile.
I guess with D being home, I was out of my normal "get the kids ready for the pool" routine. N got sunburned on her shoulders, arms and neck. All evening, I have been thinking, "I need to get better sunscreen," and "I need to reapply to her more often while we're in the water."
It just occurred to me and D that I didn't put sunscreen on her AT ALL! I did her face but completely forgot the rest of her body. I told D to do G, so he is fine, but N looks like a little lobster. Of course, D says to me in a kind-of exasperated, I can't believe you did something so stupid voice, "Well, Carrie," making me feel even worse (but I have to remind myself that he could have taken the initiative and done her after he finished G so I'll take 95% of the blame but not the full load).
Ohhhh, the GUILT!!! I am so upset now after realizing that she didn't have any sunscreen on. I honestly don't think I'll be able to sleep. I'll have to go to WebMD and research sunburns and skin cancer risk. Tomorrow I'm going out first thing and buying a boat-fucking-load of sunscreen.
Ohhh, my heart seriously hurts over this. I know it sounds like I am exaggerating but I totally feel rotten. How could I have forgotten? DUMB! DUMB! DUMB!
1 comment:
Mommy guilt eats at me all the time, it's hard, but I find I have to just let it roll off as much as possible. We all do things or don't do things that we wish we could change. It will never end.
We just do the best we can and I KNOW that you are better than most.
Chin up my friend:)
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