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Tuesday, March 18, 2008

An Open Letter to Baby Boy Clothes Designers

Dear Designers of Baby Boy Clothes--

I am the mother of a 6-month-old who weighs over 20 lbs making him wear size 12 month outfits. He cannot sit alone for very long and he doesn't have a neck yet. He cannot roll over very well and so you understand that crawling, standing and walking are many, many months away. He has no teeth and hasn't yet partaken of "real food."

He is a baby.
NOT A TINY LITTLE MAN.

As such, he SHOULDN'T UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WEAR BUTTON DOWN LINEN SHIRTS, PULLOVER SWEATER VESTS OR 3-PIECE SUITS.

He should be in cute little rompers with bottles and pacifiers and all things baby on them.

He doesn't surf, so please don't make so much goddamn surfing-related clothing. He doesn't yet play in the dirt constantly so can we avoid all the brown for awhile? It is not too feminine to have some cute rounded collars on shirts instead of fricking striped polos.

Not every boy who wears size 12 months is a toddler. Mine is a baby and I want him to look like a baby!

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