A friend texted me today asking what my "plan" is for driving N to EHS.
I responded that my "plan" is to make arrangements and then watch them fall apart.
We do not get bus transportation to N's high school in the same way that we didn't get bus transportation to her middle school.
We carpooled with neighbors when N and their son's middle school years overlapped.
There are good things and not good things about carpooling.
The good thing is that you share the driving.
Depending on schedules, this could mean you take entire weeks off.
The bad part of carpooling is that during your week off you get used to it.
TOO used to it, in fact, which means when you have to drive the following week you are out of habit and, perhaps,a little a lot whiny.
Another downside to carpooling is that in your head, you think carpooling means you will drive less, but if your child does activities or if the child you carpool with does activities, you may still end up driving to and fro to pick up your child.
In high school, it is almost certain that whatever you think the plan will be, your child or your child's coach will make a schedule that sucks complete ass and forces you to drive up to the school or make all kinds of weird driving arrangements.
Basically, I think the secret to being satisfied with any carpooling arrangement is to prepare to drive your kid every single day and then be pleasantly surprised on occasions when you don't have to.
Here is a funny story:
My MIL's neighbor's daughter (that is 3 degrees of separation) came up to me one evening when we were at my MIL's to eat dinner in the very early summer, long before I'd even thought about August and carpooling.
This lady, whom I barely know, just came to the back door with her daughter, who sometimes plays with my kids, and stood there.
It was weird.
Anyway, this mom just kind of stood there for a few minutes making small talk and then asked me how I was getting N to school and whether I could give her daughter a ride.
Since I have been in the habit this past year (N's 8th-grade year) of driving her to school, I didn't and don't mind giving this lady's daughter a ride to school, BUT I will not go backward.
The child lives in the opposite direction of the school from our house, so I told the mom if she can get the girl to our house, then I will take her the rest of the way.
I told her that if I am subbing, I pull out of my driveway at 6:40 am, and her daughter has to be at my house at 6:35.
If I'm not subbing, I'm leaving at 7:00 am, and her daughter has to be at our house by 6:55 am.
I figure she needs me more than I need her, so these are my "rules."
If she doesn't like them, she can find her daughter another ride.
This sounds heartless, and maybe it is, but all is fair in love, war, and car rides to high school.
D couldn't believe that I had agreed to this madness.
He believes I always think so well on my feet, but I was more or less ambushed by someone I don't know well.
And I don't lie.
(I can lie but I'm very obviously lying and it is just pathetic, so I don't.)
He is worried that he will have to answer the door when they show up late and tell them that I have already gone.
I told him that I know it will be A GRAND INCONVENIENCE for him to answer the front door while I'm driving our kid to school before 7:00 am, but I know he can do it.
Anyway, once we learned that N was playing field hockey and I had her practice schedule, I texted the ambush mom to tell her that I won't be picking N up on days she has practice, which means I also won't be picking her daughter up.
Two days after that, ambush mom texted me asking if I had room for another child.
A child I don't know.
A complete stranger.
Now the honest-to-God truth is that I don't really want to drive this lady's kid to school, but I'm doing it because 1. she ambushed me and 2. I do at least know her child, and 3. it doesn't hurt to be nice especially since I'm not having to backtrack to pick her up in the morning.
However, I draw the line at people I barely know roping me into rides for people I don't know at all.
I almost texted her back: "WTF? I'm not Uber."
I opted to just text back, "No."
Both my MIL and D think this will be a short-lived arrangement, and maybe it will be.
When I told N that I am subbing the first four days of school and will need to drop her off early, she sighed and huffed a bit so I asked, "Are you inconvenienced by having to get up early and be dropped off?"
She said, "A little."
I replied, "I don't know anything about being inconvenienced."
Here's to a new year of fun driving-to-school stories.
I responded that my "plan" is to make arrangements and then watch them fall apart.
We do not get bus transportation to N's high school in the same way that we didn't get bus transportation to her middle school.
We carpooled with neighbors when N and their son's middle school years overlapped.
There are good things and not good things about carpooling.
The good thing is that you share the driving.
Depending on schedules, this could mean you take entire weeks off.
The bad part of carpooling is that during your week off you get used to it.
TOO used to it, in fact, which means when you have to drive the following week you are out of habit and, perhaps,
Another downside to carpooling is that in your head, you think carpooling means you will drive less, but if your child does activities or if the child you carpool with does activities, you may still end up driving to and fro to pick up your child.
In high school, it is almost certain that whatever you think the plan will be, your child or your child's coach will make a schedule that sucks complete ass and forces you to drive up to the school or make all kinds of weird driving arrangements.
Basically, I think the secret to being satisfied with any carpooling arrangement is to prepare to drive your kid every single day and then be pleasantly surprised on occasions when you don't have to.
Here is a funny story:
My MIL's neighbor's daughter (that is 3 degrees of separation) came up to me one evening when we were at my MIL's to eat dinner in the very early summer, long before I'd even thought about August and carpooling.
This lady, whom I barely know, just came to the back door with her daughter, who sometimes plays with my kids, and stood there.
It was weird.
Anyway, this mom just kind of stood there for a few minutes making small talk and then asked me how I was getting N to school and whether I could give her daughter a ride.
Since I have been in the habit this past year (N's 8th-grade year) of driving her to school, I didn't and don't mind giving this lady's daughter a ride to school, BUT I will not go backward.
The child lives in the opposite direction of the school from our house, so I told the mom if she can get the girl to our house, then I will take her the rest of the way.
I told her that if I am subbing, I pull out of my driveway at 6:40 am, and her daughter has to be at my house at 6:35.
If I'm not subbing, I'm leaving at 7:00 am, and her daughter has to be at our house by 6:55 am.
I figure she needs me more than I need her, so these are my "rules."
If she doesn't like them, she can find her daughter another ride.
This sounds heartless, and maybe it is, but all is fair in love, war, and car rides to high school.
D couldn't believe that I had agreed to this madness.
He believes I always think so well on my feet, but I was more or less ambushed by someone I don't know well.
And I don't lie.
(I can lie but I'm very obviously lying and it is just pathetic, so I don't.)
He is worried that he will have to answer the door when they show up late and tell them that I have already gone.
I told him that I know it will be A GRAND INCONVENIENCE for him to answer the front door while I'm driving our kid to school before 7:00 am, but I know he can do it.
Anyway, once we learned that N was playing field hockey and I had her practice schedule, I texted the ambush mom to tell her that I won't be picking N up on days she has practice, which means I also won't be picking her daughter up.
Two days after that, ambush mom texted me asking if I had room for another child.
A child I don't know.
A complete stranger.
Now the honest-to-God truth is that I don't really want to drive this lady's kid to school, but I'm doing it because 1. she ambushed me and 2. I do at least know her child, and 3. it doesn't hurt to be nice especially since I'm not having to backtrack to pick her up in the morning.
However, I draw the line at people I barely know roping me into rides for people I don't know at all.
I almost texted her back: "WTF? I'm not Uber."
I opted to just text back, "No."
Both my MIL and D think this will be a short-lived arrangement, and maybe it will be.
When I told N that I am subbing the first four days of school and will need to drop her off early, she sighed and huffed a bit so I asked, "Are you inconvenienced by having to get up early and be dropped off?"
She said, "A little."
I replied, "I don't know anything about being inconvenienced."
Here's to a new year of fun driving-to-school stories.
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