Friday, January 8, 2016

All the things I want to say in relation to the heightened security

Today there is a nonspecific threat against the schools in my area.  I get the sense it is similar to the threats in NYC and LA.  Our schools are on heightened security.

I dropped the boys off today because M needed to get his allergy shot beforehand---this was the plan before I knew about the threat so I took them to school out of an abundance of convenience, not caution.

Some parents have opted, like me, to send their kids to school, and some haven't.  That is the beauty of parenting in our society---you are mostly free to parent as you see fit, to make decisions that are in the best interest of yourself and your children.

For me, personally, I feel the best interests of my children are as follows:
1. routine and structure of school in general.
2. routine and structure of school especially in a heightened security setting when they may or may not have anxiety about all the unknowns in life.  Sending them to school lets them know that we keep living, even though life can be uncertain and scary.  (Life is uncertain and scary even when there isn't a nonspecific threat.)

I have posted some things on FB in an effort to interject a more rational, reasonable consideration into the mix.  Many of the posts I have seen on Facebook would, if they could, actually make a screeching sound.  A high-pitched tone of "What are YOU going to do?" or "How many of YOU are sending your kids to school?"

As a person who lives with heightened anxiety everyday of her life, I cannot make fun of people who are so freaked out that they opt to keep their kids at home.  I can't make fun of their fear.  But I do wish they would make a different choice for a variety of reasons, the biggest one being that they are allowing their own anxiety to infiltrate into their kids.  Still, it is their choice and their kids.

I don't want to be catty and shitty and reactionary.  I don't want to judge people for their decisions, but I find myself being so anyway, especially when they make asinine comments about other people's choices.

Someone I know from my kids' school posted, "God gave us 6 senses and stupidity isn't one of them." This person then went on to say he is keeping his kids home today.  I had to laugh at his comment because 1. there are 5 senses and 2. his statement suggests that people who send their kids to school today are stupid.  I suggest that people who don't realize there are actually 5 senses might want to reconsider whom they call stupid.  Furthermore, I know this person's child has special tutoring for math each week when I volunteer (so I witness this with my own eyes).  I hope he works with her on her math today while she is at home with him.

That is both funny and pathetic.....on my part and his, I think.

The truth is that if something were to happen to any of my kids as a result of the nonspecific threat at school, I would be devastated.  But if something were to happen to any of my kids in a car accident while I was driving them to the grocery, I would be devastated (and this is a MUCH more likely scenario).  If they were to be shot when I took them to a movie theater, I would be devastated.  (Honestly, I was more concerned when D took N to see the new Star Wars movie over winter break at the new, very packed theater near our house than I am about this school thing).

I am going to die, and my children are going to die, and there isn't really much I can do about it.  I could maybe, possibly, postpone it, if it was a disease, but death is a fact.  A scary, troubling, heartbreaking fact.  

No amount of keeping them home is going to change that.  

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