I've been on a bit of a Twitter news detox, which has mostly been the result of not having the time.
I decided to play a bit of catch-up and am now reading about a second woman coming forward with information about Brett Kavanaugh.
I wrote nearly a year ago about my own very minor, very tame #metoo story.
Tonight, my parents came over for dinner and somehow we got around to talking about the priest situation in Pittsburg, PA and the Blasey Ford/Kavanaugh story. My mom said something along the lines of, "Why do people wait so long to speak out?"
So I told her about the boy in Florida.
I'm 45 years old, and I told my mother about this situation dating back 30+ years.
To prove a point.
Most people don't talk about unpleasant things.
A couple weekends ago when I was feeling suicidal after G's latest diagnosis, I went to the store and had people ask me, "How are you?," and I answered, "Oh fine," even though I was this close to tears for the first 48 hours post-diagnosis.
When I went through my nervous breakdown in 2004, I didn't tell everyone I knew. I felt ashamed and weak and was too damned depressed to talk about it. I told people on a need.to.know basis.
I didn't start blogging about it until 2006, after two solid years of therapy and medication.
It is 2018, and I'm STILL NOT OVER IT. I'm still blogging about my issue. I'm still working through how to live with the inside of my own head.
And this is a medical condition over which I have zero control.
Imagine how well people "handle" being sexually assaulted and the fear and shame that go along with that. The feelings that maybe, just maybe, they could have avoided it (even if they couldn't have). The feelings that they could have fought harder, screamed louder, taken a different route home, gone to a different party.
So I want to hear Blasey-Ford speak, and I want to hear any other women who come out about Kavanaugh's past behavior.
But here's the kicker, and it makes me mad to even have this thought, but I think it is because I have two sons, and I know how unbelievably stupid things get when more than one are together.
Even though sexual assault is totally wrong and boys should be taught better and the penalties for boys should be harsher, I cannot help but have the wonder, the thought, "What if it was an isolated incident? Should a man be ruined for one incident that happened when he was a stupid teenager?"
Would I want my son to be ruined for one incident?
And as soon as I have that thought, I think,
"What if one stupid teenage incident ruined my daughter's entire life?"
I decided to play a bit of catch-up and am now reading about a second woman coming forward with information about Brett Kavanaugh.
I wrote nearly a year ago about my own very minor, very tame #metoo story.
Tonight, my parents came over for dinner and somehow we got around to talking about the priest situation in Pittsburg, PA and the Blasey Ford/Kavanaugh story. My mom said something along the lines of, "Why do people wait so long to speak out?"
So I told her about the boy in Florida.
I'm 45 years old, and I told my mother about this situation dating back 30+ years.
To prove a point.
Most people don't talk about unpleasant things.
A couple weekends ago when I was feeling suicidal after G's latest diagnosis, I went to the store and had people ask me, "How are you?," and I answered, "Oh fine," even though I was this close to tears for the first 48 hours post-diagnosis.
When I went through my nervous breakdown in 2004, I didn't tell everyone I knew. I felt ashamed and weak and was too damned depressed to talk about it. I told people on a need.to.know basis.
I didn't start blogging about it until 2006, after two solid years of therapy and medication.
It is 2018, and I'm STILL NOT OVER IT. I'm still blogging about my issue. I'm still working through how to live with the inside of my own head.
And this is a medical condition over which I have zero control.
Imagine how well people "handle" being sexually assaulted and the fear and shame that go along with that. The feelings that maybe, just maybe, they could have avoided it (even if they couldn't have). The feelings that they could have fought harder, screamed louder, taken a different route home, gone to a different party.
So I want to hear Blasey-Ford speak, and I want to hear any other women who come out about Kavanaugh's past behavior.
But here's the kicker, and it makes me mad to even have this thought, but I think it is because I have two sons, and I know how unbelievably stupid things get when more than one are together.
Even though sexual assault is totally wrong and boys should be taught better and the penalties for boys should be harsher, I cannot help but have the wonder, the thought, "What if it was an isolated incident? Should a man be ruined for one incident that happened when he was a stupid teenager?"
Would I want my son to be ruined for one incident?
And as soon as I have that thought, I think,
"What if one stupid teenage incident ruined my daughter's entire life?"
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