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Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Snow day #895,847,502,399

Yesterday was another snow day.

I handled it pretty well, mostly because I was miraculously able to get a telephone interview in for the article I was working on, finish the article, and receive lots of email praise from my editor (Ra-ra, Carrie you are awesome!).  I also made mulligatawny soup, pear cobbler and homemade french fries.  I finished two sit-upons that I'm making for G's kindergarten class to use in the reading garden at school.  I finished reading The One and Only Ivan (a kid-book that only requires minimal concentration).

(Ok, that telephone interview wasn't technically a miracle.  Mindless video games for children can be a blessing.)

I anticipated that today would be a snow day.
I braced myself for it.
I knew that if my district would cancel school based on the forecast of snow coming in 5 hours but no actual snow on the ground or falling from the sky, they would definitely cancel another day of school when snow IS on the ground, and the roads are middling at best.

Today sucks.
And it's not because of the children, per se.  They have hardly been irritating at all.

I've counted Girl Scout cookie booth money.
I've finished the taxes.
I've retyped all the passwords on a clean and uncrimped sheet of paper.

I have zero motivation.
I am bored, bored, bored.

There is plenty I need and want to do.

Like....

1. Read The Grapes of Wrath or Brilliant Blunders (but these are books I cannot read when children are around because I need to concentrate and extended periods of concentration are not something that happens when 3 kids are in the house due to near constant interruptions to fix a Lego or get someone a snack or find something that the child hasn't seen in 6 months and cannot accurately describe.)

2. Deposit cookie booth money at the bank (but do I really want to go through the hassle of badgering the children to "GET DRESSED MOTHAFUCKAS!!" (in my head) for something that isn't absolutely necessary and required by law....like school.)

3. Repaint the dining room furniture (which requires going out to buy paint with the kids (see #2 above) and uninterrupted time (see #1 above).

And I don't want to talk to the kids because I had Saturday and Sunday AND MONDAY, listening to them tell me things about the 19 American Girl dolls they don't actually have but think they may one day have and so these dolls are within the imaginary play repertoire which I find terribly confusing because I cannot remember what is actually real let alone keep up with things in the realm of the pretend.

I don't really want to have my child stick his fingers (which smell like butt) in my face and proceed to tell me, when I say they smell like butt, that he was scratching his butt.
This happened YESTERDAY.

I don't want to get anyone dressed in 17 layers of outdoor wear and have them come to the door, and BANG on the door, and have me fix a mitten or wipe a nose or get down a sled or make up food-colored water in spray bottles so they can paint the snow.
That was YESTERDAY (and every other of these snow days).

Call me a one-trick pony, but I'm finished.

So today at 10:39 am, I am still in my pajamas, teeth and hair unbrushed.  Beds are unmade.
The boys had Saltine crackers for breakfast because that is what they wanted, and I simply am too unambitious today to care.

I did take a load of laundry out of the drier, but I doubt they will be folded today.

Like every other parent in the midwest who is on their zillionth snow day of this school year, I beg of you Zeus, God, Allah, Yahweh, Indra, Rangi, and any other major or minor god of everything or weather in particular.....

Let this winter end.

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