It has occurred to me (and perhaps to some people who know me) that I might be thought of as a person who stirs the shit pot.
However, I don't seek out drama. The reason I have long been Beautification Chairperson at my kids' elementary school is that I hate drama, cliques, and discussing/debating things that aren't gonna matter 5 months from now (such as what kind of cheap Oriental Trading festival prizes to get).
I am perfectly happy being not-in-the-middle of things.
I am perfectly happy to extend grace to others.
I don't complain to the manager. I don't leave bad Yelp reviews.
However, if I see crap going on that is consistently corrupt, unjust, inconsistent, poorly managed, or thoughtless, I may say and/or do something IF such things are likely to matter 5 months from now.
Unfortunately, I think that for some people, a requirement for being a "team player" means being the type of person who blindly goes along with anyone without thinking and/or making necessary changes.
I am not a wet-carpet, sure-go-ahead-and-walk-all-over-me type of person.
Last week, I nominated myself for the SBDM at N's high school.
If I am elected, great. Maybe I can help make good things better and bad things ok.
If I am not elected, great. Then I don't have to listen in on meetings that will almost certainly go on longer than I think is necessary and/or fruitful.
Last week, I also went to tryouts to help "monitor" the mask-wearing by the girls on the field hockey team.
I don't actually care if they have a season.
I have zero (-200) interest in sports.
Sure, I would console with N about any sadness/disappointment she would have if the season didn't happen or ends early, but I also think about people during civil wars who give up EVERYTHING for years, and I think a lost season due to a pandemic is relatively small beans.
I called out some girls who kept pulling down their masks, which I'm sure they didn't appreciate.
Some people might think this was stirring a shit pot. I look at it as trying to keep the pot COVID-free so these girls can have a season that they (but not I) care about.
Another way in which I might be considered a shit-pot-stirrer is that I don't do things because someone somewhere decided that this is what a person "should" do. I like to do some actual thinking about why I'm doing whatever I'm doing or not doing.
If I'm being paid to do or not do something, I consider that.
If it is illegal to do or not do something, I consider that.
If it harms or potentially harms another person's body or feelings, I consider that.
But if it doesn't meet any of those criteria, I may very likely decide I'm gonna do what I want.
For example, last night at N's game before which the national anthem instrumental was played, I remained seated.
I wasn't getting paid. I didn't break the law. And I didn't harm anyone.
I personally think playing the national anthem should be like telling someone you love them. It should be something special, meaningful, carefully selected, and meant when it is done. It makes a little sense for the exception for the national anthem to be played for national leagues (NBA, NFL). I have no problem with the national anthem at special government events/functions. Olympics games....go for it.
But average Tom, Dick, and Harry elementary, middle school, high school, college sporting event?
C'mon.
Did my not standing hurt someone's feelings? (And yes, I have thought about that.)
It may have hurt someone's sensibilities, but those are not the same as feelings.
If all of this aforementioned stuff means I'm a shit-pot stirrer, well, I guess I'll accept the title.
But I respectfully disagree with that assessment.
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