I'm raising Eric Cartman

Sometimes, in the midst of having one child come crying over suckers, you get a chuckle out of another child.

It's not a "legitimately funny haha" chuckle.
More of a "Jesus....(insert eye roll)" chuckle that comes from knowing your child's personality quirks and finding something funny to make these quirks tolerable.

G and M went to a neighbor friend's house with another boy, and they all (evidently) decided to play basketball.

Now, my boys are not athletic in the least, although M could be athletic.
G is an amalgam of all the two-left-footed people in our genealogical history combined into one human.

So when the four boys agreed to play basketball (inside), G thought it was supreme unfairness for him to have to play against either of the other boys who aren't his brother because he knows he sucks. He also knows his brother has a malleable personality. G could tell M, "Let me make this shot," and M would stand back and let him have the shot.

I texted the boys to come home for dinner and M texted back,
"G is coming home because X and Y don't agree with him on basketball."

And the first thing that popped into my head was this:

I shared a shorter version with the boys.

M replied, "Well, yeah."

We love our G, but we also know what we're dealing with.